The explosion of internet use in the last decade has provided society with an incredible resource – we can shop online, download books, music, movies and more. The proliferation of personal websites such as Facebook, MySpace and Yahoo 360 has also provided limitless networking opportunities on a global scale. And yet recent media reports have some users running scared; communicating in cyberspace has its inherent risks and people may not be who they appear: there have been many arrests of men who trawl the internet looking for sex with underage girls, pretending to be teenagers themselves.
The number of online dating sites has exploded also and while most sites require members to be aged 18 or over, reducing the vulnerability of users to some extent, there are still risks associated with communicating with someone in an online environment.
Pink Sofa is very mindful of this and one of the very first messages members receive from the Webmistress involves staying safe online:
Keep safe online!
BE SMART
Don’t give out your personal contact details!
BE SURE
Get to know someone before you meet them.
Send lots of messages.
BE SAFE
Meet in a busy place.
Never meet at your house the first time.
Let’s take these steps one at a time.
BE SMART – Don’t give out your personal contact details!
In much the same way as it’s not advisable to hand out your phone number in a pub or club, don’t give out any details such as your real name, phone number or address until you have met your new online friend in person and can get a feel for what she’s really like. As women we are often notoriously (sometimes blindly!) trusting and while most times there are no legitimate reasons to be mistrustful, as the old expression goes it is better to be safe than sorry.
BE SURE – Get to know someone before you meet them.
Send lots of messages.
No amount of online communication will prepare you for a real life meeting, but spend time getting to know your friend online before you meet her face to face. You will be able to discern some of her traits through online communication – does she respond to your messages in a timely manner? Is she enthusiastic in her messages? How candid has she been about her past? Is the tone of her messages consistent – that is, does it sound like it’s really “her” or a persona she’s developed for online meetings?
BE SAFE – Meet in a busy place. Never meet at your house the first time.
Even if you feel like you really know the person well, it is imperative that you treat your first meeting with caution. Ensure that friends and family know where you are going, with whom (your new friend’s username, if not her real name) and what time you should be expected home. Meet in a public place, never your house or hers: if things don’t work out the way you expected you can leave a public place with more ease than a private home.
Although you might view these warnings with some cynicism – “It won’t happen to me”, at Pink Sofa we urge you to be vigilant in regards to staying safe. We want you to enjoy your experience on Pink Sofa, and careful preparation and planning will help you do just that!
Tags: Lesbian, Lesbian dating, online dating, online safety, pink sofa, pinksofa
